The Guy at the Waffle House Recommends…

WafflesWhen we last left my sprawling Winter Meetings narrative, I had heroically managed to make it all the way to a nearby Waffle House. In this fine restaurant, I ended up in conversation with a man whose name I never learned. He wore a ball cap that said “agent” and worked for some sort of law enforcement agency. He was carrying a gun, and said he was “on the clock”, despite his leisurely occupation of one of the restaurant’s corner booths.

After telling me of his exploits working freelance security for John Rich (of Big and Rich fame), this unnamed “agent” gave me some recommendations on things to see and do while in Nashville. As a prisoner of the Gaylord Opryland Resort, I did not visit any of these places. Nonetheless, I feel duty-bound to present his recommendations to my vast readership, so that they may be able to experience Nashville as it was meant to be experienced. So, without further ado:

The Guy at the Waffle House’s List of Things to Do in Nashville

— Cock of the Walk Restaurant: Apparently, in the 1800s, when two boats met each other as they made their way down the Mississippi it was the custom for each boat’s “champion fighter” to go head to head. The winner of this impromptu aquatic battle was deemed the “Cock of the Walk.” This famous restaurant has named itself after this archaic, yet awesome, practice (a special tip of the hat to MLBlogs for censoring this restaurant’s name).

Cooter’s Place Museum: Located right across the street from the Opryland (how did I miss it?), this fine establishment is run by actor Ben Jones, who played Cooter on “The Dukes of Hazzard”.

Charlie Daniels Museum: A veritable shrine to a country music legend.

The Bell Witch Cave: While not in Nashville proper, it seems well worth the trip. The Bell Witch isBellmark a famous Tennessee ghost, and visitors to this site can tour a spooky cave on property once owned by the Bell Family.

Wild Horse Saloon: Okay, I actually made it to the Wild Horse. But I’ll save that for tomorrow’s update…

Postscript: During my death-defying trip back to the Opryland, a beat-up sedan pulled up alongside me and stopped. A gentleman in the passenger seat rolled down the window and said “Hey Buddy! Do you know where in the s**t we can get some beer around here?” Sadly, I was unable to assist him in his quest, much as I admired his unorthodox use of a common expletive.

Tomorrow: I thankfully bring this journal to a close.

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