The Greatest Love of All
In all honesty, I’m not feeling too well today. A headache and general fatigue has resulted in a sluggish pace here at the office, and a sluggish pace can simply not be tolerated during this, the season’s homestretch.
There’s only one thing that could possibly make me feel better, and that one thing is this: mascot love. So get ready to see some mascot love.
The mascots in question are Hootz and Holly of the Orem Owlz. Astute readers may recall a recent blog post in which I mentioned the fact that these two literal lovebirds would be getting married. Owlz media relations director Matt Gittins speculated that this would be a Minor League first, but this assertion has since been debunked by readers more knowledgable than I (mascot weddings have already taken place in Lowell and Hudson Valley, among others).
But no matter. The most important thing is that Hootz and Holly have been united in holy matrimony. Reports Gittins, the pastor:
Throughout the night we played all kinds of wedding themed promotional
games, such as a Couples Cake Eating/Feeding Competition, Flower Bouquet Toss, and a Wedding Dance Off.
The mascots in the ceremony are the Flash Fox from the NBA D-League's Utah
Flash and the dog is Charlie the Angel Dog from the old Provo Angels.
The two guys in red are actually just random fans who had dressed up on
their own for the night. We thought they fit the part so we threw them
into the ceremony.
The two girls are the promotion girls Jillian and Alicia
More from Gittins:
Here are the vows from the ceremony asked to each mascot:
Do you Hootz/Holly promise to take Holly/Hootz in wins and losses, rain or
shine, strikeouts and homeruns?
By the power invested in me by Minor League Baseball and by Mascot Nation
I pronounce you Man and Wife....You may kiss the bride.
Fireworks then exploded over the outfield fence as they rode off the field
in the Utah National Guard Hummer Golf Cart.
We then took the happy couple to the local sports bar for a Wedding
Reception with all the fans and players. I gave the toast at the wedding
saying that we may see some little Owlets in the future.
I wish Hootz and Holly all the best in their new life together, and hope that “Owlets” do indeed result from their state-recognized relationship. Mascot procreation is just as legitimate as any other form of procreation, and it’s high time that American society accepted this fact.
I’d be more than happy to feature other instances of mascot love on this blog, so please get in touch if you are able to provide me with such.
But in the meantime, please check out my final “Promotion Preview” column of the year.