Results tagged ‘ Charleston RiverDogs ’

Double Feature! RiverDogs and Hot Rods!

Since I didn’t post yesterday, and because we are entering a particularly “newsy” time of year, today will be devoted to TWO headline-worthy items. Let’s start with — you guessed it – food.

The Charleston RiverDogs have announced 2011’s signature dog — a frank following in the grand tradition of Pickle and Homewrecker. Food and beverage grandmaster John Schumacher writes that “our crack team of concessionaires have been working overtime in the test kitchen and scouring the State Fair Circuit far & wide for ideas.”

The result is “Pig On A Stick” — a foot long corn dog wrapped in bacon:

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Unlike more conceptual recent attention-getters such as the Three Dog Night, this one pretty much speaks for itself. And since I have attributed to it the gift of speech, I imagine it is saying “This bacon is suffocating me, it’s salty embrace inescapable.”

Speaking of embraces, the Bowling Green Hot Rods are embracing Facebook at a heretofore unheard of level. May 18 will be “Facebook Fans” night, an evening devoted to the mercurial whims of the team’s passionate social networking partisans.

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This one is quite literally a game-changer:

[T]he initial step of the promotion drives the team’s Facebook fans to recruit new members to add to its following…..Until April 18, for every 200 additional fans that ‘Like’ the team on Facebook (up to 10,000), the Hot Rods will reduce ticket prices by 50 cents for all of its Facebook fans on May 18. This means for every 1,000 new fans beyond the current 7,000, box seat ticket prices drop $2.50 from their face value of $10.

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Starting next Monday and continuing every week through the beginning of the season, the team begins phase two of the promotion. Each week a new element…will be posted on the team’s Facebook page for fans to vote on. The first element on February 21 will have fans select what time the game starts…Additional elements include which uniforms the Hot Rods will wear and what food and merchandise items will be specially priced for the game…Hot Rods Facebook fans will also be incorporated into several game day activities ranging from on-field promotions, first pitch opportunities, and meetings with Hot Rods players and coaches.

Like a serialized novella, this is going to take a long time to play out. You can count on me for periodic updates and observations, as it should be quite interesting to see this one develop.

benjamin.hill@mlb.com
twitter.com/bensbiz

Joy to the World — It’s Three Dog Night

Ever since the invention of the Turducken, mankind has wondered “When will we see a similar product in hot dog form?”

That day has arrived.

In 2011, the Akron Aeros will be serving the “Three Dog Night” during each and every home game. It’s a hot dog stuffed inside a brat stuffed inside a kielbasa, placed on a hoagie roll and then slathered with sauerkraut and spicy stadium mustard.

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The finished product:

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“This is a food item that’s going to generate a lot of fan interest and a lot of full stomachs,” said Aeros assistant GM Dan Foust. “We’re planning a healthy choice concession stand in 2011, but the Three Dog Night isn’t going to come anywhere near that stand.”

Foust notes that the team is offering a ticket plan based around this triumvirate of meat. Fans can select 10 games on the schedule, and for each game they will receive a voucher good for a “Three Dog Night.”

“So, it’s conceivable that we’ll have fans who eat at least 10 of these next season,” said Fouts. “And if they want to eat more, then more power to them.”

Just think, this could be you:

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Followers of the Minor League frankfurter scene won’t be surprised to learn that the mastermind behind the Three Dog Night is Jason Kerton, who previously performed food and beverage duties for the Charleston RiverDogs.

While in Charleston, Kerton teamed up with Goldklang Group concession guru John Schumacher on items such as the

Homewrecker and the Pickle Dog. Surely, you remember them.

Homewrecker Hot Dog.jpg
Thumbnail image for Charleston -- Pickledog.JPG

“I’m a culinary school graduate, and a huge fan of Turducken,” explained Kerton. “As I was driving [to Akron] in the middle of the night, I started to wonder if I could do the same thing with sausage.”

This mental breakthrough led to a process of trial and error, as Kerton experimented with a variety of combinations.

“I tried it with a one pound hot dog as the main part, but that was just too salty,” he said. “The kielbasa has a smoky flavor and a really snappy casing, so from there I just needed something that was a little softer….I wanted to use a brat because of the German influence in the Cleveland area, and the hot dog is a ballpark staple.”

The Aeros will be releasing a new food item every month leading up to Opening Day, making them a team to watch on the creative concessions front. And, with the Three Dog Night, they are doing nothing less than staking a claim for Minor League hot dog supremacy.

“We’re competing with the RiverDogs on the national level, and I’m sure you’ll be hearing from them soon,” said Kerton. “It’s time for a head-to-head hot dog battle.”

The Aeros have already fired three shots.

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Remaining your number one news source for concessions-based signs of the apocalypse,

benjamin.hill@mlb.com
twitter.com/bensbiz

Faster and Furiouser

battttssss.jpgThere’s nothing big to report today, but lots of little stuff. In the interest of equity, brevity, and levity, please peruse this rapid-fire collection of blog-worthy material.

I’ll call this Quick Hits! Surely no one in the history of blogging has ever done such a thing before.

(Note: Quick Hits! is a trademark of BensBizBlogCo LLC, 2010 All Rights Reserved All Wrongs Avenged)

Quick Hit! #1 — New Column Begins!
Last week marked the first edition of “Offseasoning”, an MiLB.com feature chronicling the offseason lives of Minor League players. The inaugural column focused on right-hander Terry Doyle, whose non-baseball job is a relatively common one: substitute teacher. If YOU are (or are aware of) a player engaged in an interesting offseason endeavor then by all means get in touch.

Quick Hit! #2 — Comic Strip Returns!
The Altoona Curve found great success last year with their “Curve, PA” comic strip, which ran in the local Altoona Mirror. This unique marketing tool will be featured on the team’s Facebook page during the offseason, starting today. The strip featured today would have been far creepier had it explored the concept of a “trophy wife.”

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Quick Hit! #3 — Ticket Package Offered!
The Charleston RiverDogs are a Yankees affiliate, but today they revealed a ticket package designed to appeal to the Braves fans in their midst. It’s called “Braves Rome to Charleston,” and includes “two tickets to the nearly-sold out 7th Annual Hot Stove Banquet on Jan. 28 that features recently-retired Braves’ skipper Bobby Cox…In addition, the RiverDogs will throw in two lower level box seat tickets to either the Sat., April 16 game or Sat., June 4 contest against the Rome Braves.”

Are YOU aware of any creative ticket packages? If so then get in touch.
Quick Hit! #4 — Artifacts Displayed!
The Omaha Royals played their last game at Rosenblatt Stadium this season, truly the end of an era. But Rosenblatt lives on at Cooperstown, as the Baseball Hall of Fame is currently displaying mementos from the final contest. Here’s a picture that includes Rosenblatt’s home plate (more pictures can be found on the the O-Royals’ Facebook page):

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Quick Hit! #5Vacation Awarded!
For the 21st consecutive year, the Pawtucket Red Sox have provided a pair of local Boys and Girls Club members with an all-expenses paid trip to the World Series.The winners, selected in August, received tickets to Games 3-5 in in Arlington as well as yesterday’s Cowboys game.

Quick Hit! #6 — Teams Ranked!
According to a new study released by sportsfangraphs.com, the Toledo Mud Hens lead all of Minor League Baseball in combined Facebook fans and Twitter followers. Check out the Mud Hens’ release HERE, and the full list HERE.

Quick Hit! #7 — Countdown Continues!
As noted in Friday’s blog, the Wisconsin Timber Rattlers are releasing a series of videos in anticipation of the team’s November 12 logo unveiling. I particularly enjoyed yesterday’s Halloween video:

Quick Hit! #8 — Baseball Songs Sung!

If you like music and you like baseball, then chances are that you like songs about baseball. If so, you might want to check out “The Greatest Game in the World” by The Thrill Building. This power pop paean to our national pastime features 22 songs over 80 minutes, providing the sort of fuel necessary to make it through the offseason.

Speaking of fuel, let me know what’s going on. I am, once again, out of material.

benjamin.hill@mlb.com
twitter.com/bensbiz

Why Won't It Stop?

ketchup-500.jpgI’ve been playing catch-up this week, hearkening me back to my days as a featured performer at the Condiment Theater.

This is because baseball, quite inconsiderately, doesn’t take a day off. So while I was on the road cranking out articles, blog posts, Promo Preview columns, and frivolous contest introductions, the emails kept coming in alerting me to items that may be worthy of coverage.

Allow me to now present to you, the reader, some of these items. I’ll start with the most narcissistic, a 42-second video commemorating my stint as “The Apprentice…Of the Crazy Hot Dog Vendor.

With that out of the way, let’s proceed to last night’s promotion in Akron. The Aeros held “Ship Out LeBron Night”, in which fans were asked to donate unwanted LeBron James apparel in exchange for free tickets.

As you can see, quite a few fans took the team up on its offer. As soon as Orbit is done playing around, these items will be donated to an international relief organization.

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A mascot doing snow angels atop the discarded apparel of a vilified NBA superstar is definitely something you don’t see every day.

Another thing you don’t see every day is 3,692 people popping bubble wrap at the same time. It makes a sound quite similar to dessicated locust husks bouncing off the roof of a station wagon.

As part of the promotion, the Spinners rolled out the “Bubblewrap Dance Floor.” To celebrate 50 years of bubblewrap, 50-year-olds were invited onto the field to dance to 50 cent.

An even more Rainman-esque aspect of the promotion was that the 50th fan in attendance would get a year’s supply of popcorn if the 50th out of the game occurred via pop out. It did, and one lucky fan took home a vast collection of kernels (Spinners media relations director Jon Boswell writes that, keeping in the spirit of the promotion, “He’ll have to do the popping himself!”)

The Spinners’ Bubble Wrap extravaganza was in last week’s “Promotion Preview” column. This week’s includes the following two top-quality items.

Torii Hunter Bobble-Arm in Orem

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Skipper Leg Lamp in Lake County

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I wish that the above item was being given away as part of a “Salute to Hallucinogenic Fever Dreams” promo, but there’s actually a story behind it. See, the Captains are staging “Christmas In July”, and “A Christmas Story” was filmed in nearby Cleveland. Hence, a giveaway featuring a Minor League twist on one of the movie’s most memorable scenes.

And speaking of the Captains, you may recall that one of the team’s biggest fans comes to nearly every game dressed like Waldo. Recently, this horizontally-striped standout took his act to Cleveland:

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Certainly a Waldo this ambitious is worthy of your Facebook fandom. Perhaps I can even score an exclusive interview one of these days.

Also worthy of your Facebook fandom is the fourth annual Minors Moniker Madness, which seeks to determine the best name in the Minors (MMM can also be followed on Twitter).

This year’s contest is shaping up to be the best yet, as teams have mounted homegrown promotional campaigns in support of their players. Here’s one of the best efforts I’ve seen thus far:

Finally, you may have noticed that the Charleston RiverDogs and Hickory Crawdads have recently been the recipients o
f some big-time exposure:

Perhaps I’ll receive some big-time exposure one of these days. Until then, I’ll be staring at a computer screen in search of a clever closing sentence that never comes.

benjamin.hill@mlb.com
twitter.com/bensbiz

Have You Seen This Man?

Thumbnail image for Charleston_RallyVinnieBasic.JPGThe individual on your left is Vinnie Colangelo, the veteran clubhouse manager of the Charleston RiverDogs.

Mr. Colangelo came to my attention thanks to an email from RiverDogs play-by-play man Danny Reed, who wrote that “Vinnie has become well known as one of the best clubbies in the Minors, and he has also grown to be quite popular with the fans.”

This spotless reputation motivated the team to create a “Rally Vinnie” alter-ego for Colangelo. Whenever the RiverDogs need some runs in the late innings of a ballgame, “Rally Vinnie” flashes on the scoreboard. There are many permutations of “Rally Vinnie”, many of which are tied into whatever promotional theme night the RiverDogs happen to be staging.

Let’s take a look:

Charleston_RallyVinnieMario.JPGCharleston_RallyVinnieWildWest.JPG 

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Reached by phone, “Rally Vinnie” was decidedly nonplussed about this late-inning ballpark development.

“The players seem to get a kick out of it, I just wish it would work a little bit more,” he said.Charleston_RallyVinnieShaving.JPG “I’d guess that it’s [inspired a rally] about 50% of the time so far.”

Colangelo went on to say that he is occasionally recognized in Charleston as “Rally Vinnie”, but that the demanding nature of his job has kept him from capitalizing on his unique celebrity status.

“The character’s not that big, and I don’t get to go out much [during the season],” he said modestly, perhaps underestimating the appeal of a rally-starting clubhouse manager.

Charleston_RallyVinnieBeard.JPGBut at the very least, Rally Vinnie has become a source of inspiration for his co-workers.

“They’ve put my face on a lot of different things,” said Colangelo. “The Mario one was pretty good, and I liked the Smurf one, too. I guess they’ll just keep on coming up with stuff they think is funny.”

Come to think of it, this could serve as the motto for the entire industry.

Minor League Baseball: Coming Up With Stuff We Think Is Funny Since 1902.

benjamin.hill@mlb.com
twitter.com/bensbiz

The ‘Dogs Are In A Pickle

Thumbnail image for Thumbnail image for Thumbnail image for Thumbnail image for profriverdogs.jpgThe Charleston RiverDogs already have a reputation as one of the foremost frankfurter purveyors in all of Minor League Baseball.

The Class A Yankees affiliate offers dozens of dogs at Joseph P. Riley Ballpark, from the “Asian Invasion” (soy sauce, wasabi, crunchy chow mein noodles) to the “Dixie Dog” (chili and pimento cheese) to the signature “RiverDog” (cole slaw and pickled okra). And let’s not forget the gargantuan “Homewrecker”, which gained national prominence after “Man vs. Food” host Adam Richman gave it a try.

But yesterday the club announced what is perhaps their most fantastical hot
dog creation yet
, an unprecedented concoction that is sure to polarize the American populace.

This:

Charleston -- Pickledog.JPG

Your eyes do not deceive you. This is a hot dog with a hollowed-out pickle for a bun, held together by a layer of cole slaw. It will be served at Joseph P. Riley Ballpark in 2010, now destined to go down in history as “the Year of the Pickle Dog”.

The man responsible for this creation is John Schumacher, who oversees the food and beverage departments of the five Minor League teams owned by the Goldklang Group (of which the RiverDogs are one).

Schumacher explained that the Pickle Dog was inspired by the iconic Chicago-style hot dog, whichThumbnail image for pickle.jpg includes pickles among its wide array of toppings.

“We’re always willing to beg, borrow and steal from whatever’s out there; that’s how we generally get our inspiration,” he said.

So if the Chicago Dog could include pickles on a hot dog, why couldn’t the RiverDogs put a hot dog in one? The difference goes far beyond semantics, however.

“We experimented for about a month and a half, and we kept saying ‘We need a bigger pickle'” said Schumacher, noting that pickles of insufficient size led to the hot dog slipping out of its briny bun upon the first bite. “A bigger pickle, that’s the answer to everything.”

An appropriately proportioned dill variety was eventually obtained — jumbo-sized specimens that are cut in half, cored, and slathered in slaw. Schumacher says that this results in a “perfect boat”, with the slaw’s adhesive properties helping to keep the meat in place.

“A secondary benefit of the slaw is that, in an unexplainable twist, people in the south just love cole slaw on their hot dogs. In this town, it’s a perfect fit,” he noted.

smallpicklemascot.jpgThe team is happy with the finished product, to the point where RiverDogs’ concession workers will be sporting shirts this season that read “Man Bites Pickle Dog” (an alternate name for the product, the “Dill Dog”, was briefly considered and wisely rejected).

And if Charlestonians pick the pickle at a prodigious pace, more could be in store.

“If the Pickle Dog gets into Phase Two, then we’ll deep fry the whole thing,” said Schumacher, describing a food product that will be heavenly for some, indescribably nightmarish for others.

Either way, the RiverDogs’ craving to create culinary curiosities will continue.

“We’re always looking to try something new, and we’re certainly not going to stop with the pickle,” said Schumacher.

You’ve been warned, America.

benjamin.hill@mlb.com
twitter.com/bensbiz

(For those interested in pickles of an anthropomorphic variety, the above mascot costume can be obtained HERE)

Charleston's Got Male

Thumbnail image for Thumbnail image for Thumbnail image for profriverdogs.jpgIn keeping with yesterday’s theme of taking a closer look at just-released promotional schedules, I would like to bring the Charleston RiverDogs to your attention.

The always irreverent South Atlantic League ballclub released their 2010 promo schedule yestereday, and it is filled with many dates worth circling. Or at least potentially worth circling. You see, the RiverDogs are masters of the mysterious, and many of their theme nights sound less like baseball promotions and more like an unpublished Daniel Pinkwater novel. For instance: “What Do You Put On Your Grits?”, “The Holy City Breaks Wind”, and “It’s Raining Relish.” And let’s not forget such potential classics as “MacGruber Does Your Taxes”, “There is no ‘I’ in A-Team”, and “Aaron Radatz Predicts the Final Score.”

And then there’s July 17’s “Lady Liberty Statue Giveaway“, in which fans will receive a mini-replica of Charleston’s proposed “male Statue of Liberty.” The team is having fans vote on which man’s face they would like to see on the giveaway statue, with the choices being Steven Colbert, Andy Dick, Chris Rock, and mascot Charlie T. RiverDog.

I am not making any of this up, and would like to note for the record that Andy Dick on the Statue of Liberty would mark a new low for American civilization. Even lower than THISThumbnail image for adick.jpg. Actually, I take that back. I love Pat Boone’s metal album and would suggest that team’s play it at the stadium. Put THIS on when the opposing team’s closer takes the mound.

— To move on to music of a more durable quality, I’d suggest everyone take a listen to the new Baseball Project track. I’ve written about the Baseball Project before, and had the opportunity to see them in New Orleans while attending the Minor League Baseball Promotional Seminar. They will worth keeping an eye on in 2010 and beyond.

— Don’t let all this talk of music make you think I am forgetting videos. Far from it. First I would like to share the Bowie Baysox’s new video podcast, which begins with a flurry of Eastern League puns that I found to be delightful:

And here, the Gwinnett Braves show that they’re ready for the season. Perhaps a bit prematurely:

I have fulfilled today’s blogging requirements, and as such may now retire to my country estate for an evening of Port and Sports. It’s what I do every Wednesday, and tonight’s agenda includes women’s volleyball and a bottle of Presidential 20-year Tawny.

benjamin.hill@mlb.com
twitter.com/bensbiz

I'm Right Here Waiting For You

tulsa_drillers.pngI am writing this on Friday evening, well aware that most of you won’t be reading it until Monday morning.

So, how was your weekend? Those football games were awesome, weren’t they? A Saints-Jets Colts Super Bowl is really something to look forward to! And how about Conan’s last show? I thought the funniest best part was when Neil Young did a song parody called “The Network and the Damage Done” his farewell speech.

And speaking of Conan, in yesterday’s (I mean, Thursday’s) post I gave credit to the Round Rock Express for being the first Minor League team to offer Conan a job. Well, the Tulsa Drillers made an offer of their own:

“[The Drillers] will make Conan O’Brien our official MC for every
Drillers game for as long as
labamba.jpg he and you all live. The Tonight Show
Band? They can play every game — even LaBamba. Andy Richter, Pierre
Bernard, Preparation H Raymond, The [self-pleasuring] Bear, and PimpBot 5000
can all join our full-time staff. Bring them all.

We are fully prepared to offer you all your very own suite at ONEOK
Field to enjoy each Drillers game. Come on, guys, “The CoCo Cabana”.
Seriously. we can make it happen.”

The full letter can be read HERE, in all its resplendent red-haired glory.

Thumbnail image for Thumbnail image for profriverdogs.jpgSpeaking of resplendent glory, the city of Charleston, SC is positively aglow with the news that a male Statue of Liberty may be erected in the city. Of course, the RiverDogs can not let news of such magnitude go by unnoticed. Behold, the “Be Your Own Statue” contest:

As part of their new Be Your Own Fan
marketing initiative, the RiverDogs are asking all fans to help determine the
face, shape and size of the new statue. The Be Your Own Statue promotion
invites fans to submit a drawing, photograph or video letting the club know who
should be the face of this new national monument.

The winner will be revealed as part of the All
Things Male promotional night, set for Saturday, July 17, when
Charleston hosts the Augusta GreenJackets for a 7:05 p.m. first pitch.

“All Things Male” promotional night? I hope that’s better than last year’s “All Things Mail” Night, which didn’t deliver despite my stamp of approval.

And speaking of approval, the Trenton Thunder get mine for a new Twitter contest (ortwitter2010.jpg “Twitest”) announced today: Project 2010 in 2010. Here’s the scoop:

The Thunder’s goal is to have 2,010
Twitter followers by Opening Night (April 8, 2010). When we reach that
number, the Thunder will conduct a random drawing among their Twitter
followers, and give away a Grand Prize to one lucky fan. All of our
followers will also be winners because we’ll release an exclusive
ticket special just for them.

Grand prize is a jersey signed by
the 2010 team.

And speaking of 2010, that’s what year it is. But right now it’s winter, and therefore cold, and therefore our nation’s baseball stadiums are not exactly in optimal condition. Check out these pictures of Principal Park I received today from the Iowa Cubs, who stole the joke I would inevitably have made by writing “Ice Cubs” in the subject line:

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But if thoughts of Spring are more your thing, then take solace in this: The Reading Phillies announced today that their first “Gluttony Night” of the season will be held on April 9. They also announced that the evening will double as “Crazy About Reading Night” and I was like “Duh guys, every team is crazy about themselves.”

Finally, MiLB.com has a brand-new message board feature. If someone could take it upon his or herself to start a thread on how Benjamin Hill is the greatest and most overlooked writer in the entire world I’d really appreciate it. I’m too modest to do it myself, you see.

benjamin.hill@mlb.com
twitter.com/bensbiz

RiverDogs Rough the Ref

The NFL season began yesterday, so now represents as good a time as any in which to dip into my deep reservoir of blog topics in order to retrieve this:

The Charleston RiverDogs’ “Illegal Use of Your Ed Hochuli Night.”

This bizarrely-named evening of ref-mocking merriment was staged in honor of NFL game arbiter Ed Hochuli, who made several game-changing gaffes last season. He also has a penchant for working out and wearing form-fitting shirts:

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 “Illegal Use of Your Ed Hochuli Night” took place on August 11. Here’s a look into how it went down.

Before the game, fans were invited onto the field in order to toss the football around (both regulation and foam balls were available for use):

Charleston -- Pregame Football Catch.JPG

An Ed Hochuli impersonator was on hand, throwing flags around the stands for nonexistent or illogical reasons (ie “Illegal Use of Being a Patriots Fan”):

Charleston -- Hochuli Flexing.JPG

Here, faux-Hochuli makes a call as part of a between-inning “Guess the Penalty” contest:

Charleston -- Hochuli Makes Clipping Call.JPG

Here are the choices the fans were given:

Charleston -- Penalty Choices.JPG

For the record, the answer was “D” (according to my sources, many fans went with “C”).

A multi-faceted “Sack the GM” contest also took place, featuring kicking, passing, punting, and tackling. In each category, GM Dave Echols found an underhanded way to defeat his opponent (local radio personality DJ Potter). In the tackling portion of the contest, which naturally included Sumo suits, Echols declined to participate and instead sent out assistant GM Jim Pfander. Here, Pfander tackles Potter:

Charleston -- Hochuli im tackles potter.JPG

Prompting faux-Hochuli to call a facemask penalty:

Charleston -- Hochuli calls penalty on jim.JPG
 
Upon further review, it was determined that neither competitor was even wearing a face mask…it was just that kind of night.

(Thanks to Ashley Stephenson for the info and pictures).

That will do it for me for the week. Thank you for reading, and let me conclude by reminding you to go see a Minor League playoff game this weekend if you have any opportunity to do so. Do not go gentle into that good night. Rage, rage against the dying of the light….

benjamin.hill@mlb.com

Potential Is Realized

My list of “potential blog topics” has become exceedingly unruly, thanks to my tendency to fill every square inch of notebook paper before flipping over to a fresh sheet. The page is so crowded that I can barely read my own writing anymore.  

Therefore, time is of the essence. I must share as many of these “potential blog topics” as I can, before they are lost forever due to poor notebook maintenance.

So let’s do this!

As Seen On TV, Literally — Hey, look: the Fresno Grizzlies recieved a small dose of sweet, sweet nationwide exposure as a result of their “As Seen on TV Night” relay race.

Traficant Do It — The Mahoning Valley Scrappers put their name into action when they were forced to scrap September 2’s “Traficant Release Night.” For those who don’t keep up onTraficant.jpg Ohio’s sordid political scandals, James Traficant is a former congressman currently in jail as a result of a whole slew of felonious offenses related to corruption and general sleaziness. The Scrappers’ promotion was meant to acknowledge (and perhaps satirize) Traficant’s upcoming release from prison, but not everyone in the community was on board with the idea. After receiving a virtual mountain of complaints the team wisely put a kibosh on the whole thing. In its place? “Valley Pride Night” — a celebration of area businesses, attractions, and individuals that is sure to be far less divisive than a corrupt politician with a staggeringly bad toupee.

A Great Need, Fulfilled — The simmering feud between Akronites and Birminghamians will soon get an outlet, as whatifsports.com will be running a simulated seven-game series between the Eastern League Aeros and the Southern League Barons.

The theme song for this promotion should be a parody of Mary Poppins’ Chim Chim Cher-ee“: Sim Sim Series, Sim Sim Series, Sim Sim Series/A Sweep is as lucky, as lucky as can be.” I didn’t even have to change that second line at all!

Outside of My Jurisdiction — I cover the world of affiliated Minor League Baseball. You know this. But I still receive emails from individuals and organizations within other subsections of the sports marketing landscape, many of whom are staging promotions that could most certainly be described as “Minor League Baseball-esque”. Like this — “Jon and Kate Plus Eight Family Night” at Washington state’s Skagit Speedway:

Skagit Speedway will ensure the ultimate fun for “Jon & Kate Plus 8 Night” families by banning all paparazzi and tabloid reporters from the facility for the evening. Families are encouraged to video their own reality show at the event and upload the experience to YouTube.

I also recently recieved a promotional email from a big league club, something that does not happen very often. So, hey, check it out — everyone who buys a “special event ticket” for the San Francisco Giants’ upcoming “Latino Heritage Night” receives a limited-edition Carlos Santana bobblehead:

San Francisco -- Santana Bobble.JPG

This One Blows — I included the Northwest Arkansas Naturals’ “Kazoo World Recordkazoopy.jpg Attempt” in the August 11 edition of “Promotion Preview”. The club has since sent out a press release announcing that 3000 fans participated in a group rendition of “Take Me Out to the Ballgame”, thereby establishing a new world record. While I congratulate the Naturals on their efforts, I wonder if they will be able to have their achievement validated by the Guinness Book of World Records. As I learned while researching this article, breaking a world record is much easier said than done.

Switching Things Up — Ambidextrous pitching prospect Pat Venditte is regularly profiled in the national media, by artisans and hacks alike. The most recent feature aired this Tuesday on ESPN’s E60 program — and included footage of Venditte while he was with the Charleston RiverDogs. This gave the club the opportunity to boast that they would be on national television on back-to-back nights, as on Wednesday the RiverDogs’ Homewrecker Hot Dog appeared on the Travel Channel’s Man vs. Food.

The lesson here is simple — ambidextrous pitchers and giant frankfurters never fail to get the national media’s attention. Teams lacking these attributes should rectify the situation immediately.

That will be it for me this week. Thanks, as always, for reading and emailing.

benjamin.hill@mlb.com

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